Selena Gomez started World Mental Health Day by posing in a Schiaparelli dress for the London photo-call of Emilia Pérez. But in the afternoon, she joined her mum, Mandy Teefey, and licensed social worker Minaa B for the keynote of Wondermind’s Mental Fitness Summit.
Gomez spoke about her own experience with mental health, sharing that she isolated herself for years. Now, she leans on a small community. ‘I don’t have a lot of people in my life, [but] I know who my inner circle is,’ she said. ‘I have to talk things out. And I have a therapist too, but it’s also nice to have people around you who will just listen to you. There is a freedom in letting go of whatever it is that’s keeping you stuck and that lump in your throat.’
At one point, the panel discussed how best to take care of yourself when you’re feeling overwhelmed by uncertainty and don’t want to leave your bed. That’s when Gomez revealed she had so much trouble with this in the past that she now no longer sleeps in her bedroom.
‘I am a very anxious person,’ she began. ‘It’s kind of like doomsday, and I think having a positive conversation with yourself, even if that sounds weird, it’s really impactful. Like before I step out of the car, and there’s going to be lots of noises and stuff—if that’s the case, I’m not saying that’s every day—but I have to breathe, and I have to say, “All of this is a gift, and I may not be in the mood for this, [but] every time I see someone and end up making them smile, [it] always just makes my day no matter how I’m feeling.”‘
‘I actually released a documentary [My Mind and Me],’ she continued, noting the film project that shed light on her struggles with psychosis and bipolar depression. ‘I’m a little bit different than my mom, because I spent too much time in my bedroom that I actually don’t even sleep in my bedroom anymore, because I associate it with such a really dark time.’
She added, ‘Being anxious is so debilitating sometimes, and yeah, I didn’t want to leave my bed for years, and part of it was I wasn’t doing the work. And you have to believe in yourself to do the work that will truly enlighten you a little bit.’
Gomez also discussed her relationship with social media, saying she had to teach herself not to feel guilty for saying she isn’t doing well.
‘I try my hardest to take these [social media] breaks, but equally I’ve had to stop trying to defend myself, because I should not be apologetic for being honest, for saying I’m not good, and that’s not nice what you said,’ she started. ‘You know, my mum has always taught me that the noise is going to be there constantly, but it’s about finding that moment where I actually physically say, “No, I am a good person, I’m kind, I work really hard, and I’m grateful, and I love all the little things in life,” and I need that reminder. I’m not going to lie, it kind of hurts. I’m definitely not one of the people who can kind of ignore it. It’s just too—I’m just speaking on my generation’s behalf because it’s wild how inhumane people can be with their words and things they would probably never say in person either. It just hurts.’
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